Well, the retreat was fabulous! Our speaker was Nancy Guthrie, and her story of deep pain and restoration was inspiring and real. She has lived through the loss of two of her children, and wrestled with the scriptures throughout her journey. Through the scriptures, she lead us to the feet of Jesus to hear Him speak to the pain that can't be prayed away, the promises that seem to be broken, and the offenses that don't deserve to be forgiven. Hear Jesus speaking:
"I know how it feels to hurt. I, too, have heard God tell me "no." Let me show you what it means to submit." (Mtw 26:36-38)
"I have a purpose for your pain. I will be enough for you in the pain that I don't take away." (2 Cor 11:24-12:10)
"I intend to heal your deadliest disease. I began to heal you at the cross, and I will bring it to completion at the Resurrection." (Jn 20:30-31, Mark 1:40,41)
"I will protect your soul for eternity; I will protect you from the evil one; I will protect you from the punishment that you deserve." (Mtw 10:1-28, Jn 17)
"Your role model for forgiving is my own generous forgiveness." (Mark 11:25, Mtw 18:21-35)
"My resource for forgiving is My Holy Spirit inside you. Your resistance to forgiving is washed away by your tears of repentance."
Okay, that's the tip of the iceberg, but you can see that she was great. Here are a few more nuggets that I need to ponder further (these were thoughts from her that prompted thoughts about myself):
- I need my confidence in God's plan and goodness to grow so large that I trust Him when He says "no."
- I need to believe that the joy of surrendering to God will be worth whatever it costs.
- God's answer to me is always to give me not what I want, but to give me more of Himself.
- I want escape from weakness, not power in weakness.
- I grab for lesser things when He is not enough for me.
- There is something infinitely more important to Him than protecting me from physical harm. He understands the big picture. It's my soul that He is concerned about.
- Looking at the cross removes any resentment that God has not protected me in the way that I wanted.
- To forgive, I have to believe that forgiveness will taste more delicious to me than my anger tastes.
- My refusal to forgive reveals that I have not even begun to see all that I've been forgiven of.
- Forgiveness is not minimizing what someone has done. It says "you hurt me deeply, but I'm not going to make you pay. I'm going to pay." It is choosing to absorb the pain and let it go.
- I know that I have truly forgiven when: the "sting" of the offense has lessened to the point that I honestly want reconciliation and not retribution; I have laid down the arrows of coldness and contempt and seek to bless that person; I have refused to keep dwelling on the injustice and instead trust God to execute justice.
I know that I've typed a large hodge-podge of stuff here, but typing it out again helps me to reflect on all that I heard and felt. It may sound like her topics were all depressing, but they actually filled me with hope as we grappled with the tough stuff. They gave me an expectation of good above what I can currently see. If you would like to hear more about Nancy, you can visit her website here. The book that I want to get from her doesn't seem to be listed on her website right now, but the title has something to do with hearing Jesus speak. I think that it's her newest one, which may be why it's not listed yet. I wish that I had a pic to share of the wonderful ladies that I got to hang out with this weekend. Being with them was just as wonderful as the messages! It's so restorative to be with people that are genuine and love you with all of your crazy flaws. That make you laugh until you are sure that you'll wet your pants! That love to shop and eat and sometimes have a bad attitude about cheesy icebreakers, too. This weekend was an extra-special gift before this baby arrives. I will soon have someone attached to me for at least a year! Thank you, Michael, for keeping the kids and for being happy to do it! You're a treasure!
Joni Eareckson Tada: "A broken heart leads to the true contentment of asking less of this life because more is coming in the next."
7 comments:
Great thought to ponder. It sounds like a wonderful weekend. I especially like "I need to believe that the joy of surrendering to God will be worth whatever it costs." Good words to hear today. BTW, when is your due date?
it sounds like a great weekend! could any of those wonderful ladies been Lauren Hauge, Lucy Henderly or Lori Scarbrough?? If so, I am completely jealous...in a good way:) It's always a fun time when you laugh so hard there's the potential for wetting pants!
I hope to look back over the list and really let it sink in! Thanks for sharing.
jenny, my due date is march 18th, though i had both of my other kiddos early (luke at 37 weeks, leah at 38). i feeling ready to pop now! april, the ladies you named are exceedingly wonderful and always fun to be with! lori went on the retreat and was largely responsible for my bladder control problems:). we miss you!
Sounds like a wonderful retreat. Good stuff to think on. Thank you for your kind words. I think you're a gem, too!
I would have love to have been there. I'm so glad you got to do that before the baby arrives!
Thanks for sharing. Sounds like a wonderful weekend. I'm going to print out some of the verses and thoughts you shared. Very powerful truths for me to reflect on further. I'll also have to check out that new book if I can find it.
Thanks for sharing that... I need to be reminded of those truths.
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